Well, guys, the responsibilities of Hospitality Chairwoman of the Norton Elementary PTA have officially been handed over to yours truly.
I'm sure that after my first board meeting this morning, the people are questioning their decision to invite me to join...
First of all, my babysitter double booked herself and had to cancel (not pointing any fingers... MOM) so I took my children. Yes, I was given permission to do so! Encouraged even, probably for the sake of quorum, lets be honest... but still, I had been assured that it would be no big deal.
And it probably WAS no big deal for 3/4 of the room.
For the people who were sitting directly in front of where my children were parked, however, the "Bibbity bopitty boo", a couple rounds of "Let it go" and A TON of "shhhhh"ing from me might have been a little distracting. That 1/4 of the room also enjoyed Lydia's little pats (she pats people, ya'll... its adorable) and her attempts at pawing through their purses. I can only assume she was looking for snacks. I mean, thats what I would be looking for so, you know, like mother, like daughter!
Did I mention that there was a 30 minute long budget report? Really important stuff, granted, and I was THRILLED to be there and hear it, seriously! I'm not being sarcastic!
I definitely learned why children should be kept as far as possible away from PTA meetings, though. 30 minute budget reports do not need a soundtrack of Disney princess songs, I promise.
Its confusing to the palette.
BUT we were doing ok... and people were giving me very sweet and very empathetic smiles and I was thinking "Boy, its awesome to be a Norton Knight. I'm pumped to be the Hospitality Chairwoman! I'm about to ROCK THIS THING."
...
And THEN.
Lydia started saying "diaper! diaper!" ...
Besides her insistence, I could smell that, yes, indeed, her diaper WAS in need of attention.
What I failed to notice, however, was that somehow she had managed to get inside her little jumper outfit and unfasten one side of the diaper... So that, by the time the meeting was over and we had RUN to the car trying to get to Laila's swim lesson on time, the poop was all down her legs and all over my hip from where I had been holding her.
Sorry, just want to be sure... did you hear what I said?!?
ALL OVER US.
POOP!!
Poop, I tell you!
At my first PTA board meeting!
AND (of course) today was the day that I had no wipes in my diaper bag... #mommyfail
AND no time for a wardrobe change before swim lessons. I mean, the children are in the pool for 30 measly minutes!! If you're 10 minutes late, you've missed a THIRD!
AND I had promised Laila that this meeting would not make us late to swim lessons. She had been very sweet, patient and quiet in the meeting and, come hell or high water, I REALLY wanted to make good on that promise!
So, being the shameless creature that I am, I stripped my baby naked in the elementary school parking lot, wiped her down with my car stash of Starbucks napkins, strapped her into her car seat topless and drove all of us, stinky, to swim lessons.
BUT WE MADE IT, friends.
We made it!
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For the rest of the day, my children will be permitted to run amok and have treats.
And I will allow myself a nap and a half price frappucino.
Norton PTA board, I had intended to wait until later to show you my crazy but, today, you got it in full measure. Thank you for being so gracious. I think we're going to have a lot of fun.
Three cheers for real life... and parent/teacher cooperation, of course!
Love,
Chels
